Funny Work Quotes

Funny Work QuotesFunny Work QuotesSometimes its a good idea to take a look for the brighter side of things, like when youve had a long day at work or youre involved in a project that felt like it took forever to finish. Having a good sense of humor about life and work may be good for you. Maybe you have a sharp wit or maybe youre looking for some work-related quotations that will brighten your day and even make you laugh. Take a look at these humorous quotes about work. Funny Quotations About Work I always give 100% at Work 10% Monday, 23% Tuesday, 40% Wednesday, 22% Thursday, and 5% Friday.? -Anonymous Getting paid to sleep... thats mydream job.?-Unknown Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a gelegenheit? -Edgar Bergen I like work it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours. -Jerome K. Jerome Whenever you are asked if you can do a job, tell em, Certainly, I can Then get busy and find out how to do it. -Theodore Roosevelt The closest to perfection a person ever c omes is when he fills out a job application form.? -Stanley J. Randall If hard work is the key to success, most people would rather pick the lock.? -Claude McDonald If A equals success, then the formula is A X Y Z. Where X is work. Y is play. Z is keep your mouth shut.? -Albert Einstein Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet Theyre about to announce the lottery numbers.? -Homer Simpson If you think your boss is stupid, remember you wouldnt have a job if he was any smarter.? -John Gotti Theres no secret about success. Did you ever know a successful man who didnt tell you about it?? -?Kin Hubbard Theres no business like show business, but there are several businesses like accounting.? -David Letterman More Quotations About Work Funny quotations are great, but there are many more quotations about work that may fit your current situation. Whether you love your job or hate it, here are more lists of quotations for you to explore Quotes A bout Hating Your JobAbout half of all workers are unhappy with their jobs, for a variety of reasons, including bad bosses, annoying co-workers, or just the unnerving feeling that theres something better out there. These quotations about hating your job will fit the bill. For example If you find what you do each day seems to have no link to any higher purpose, you probably want to rethink what youre doing. -Ronald Heifetz Quotations About Dream JobsPerhaps youre searching for the job you love or maybe youre one of the lucky ones who has the job of your dreams. A little inspiration never hurts. Take a look at these quotations about dream jobs and find quotes like these What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us. -Ralph Waldo Emerson The only goal you cant accomplish is the one that you dont go after -Vilis Ozols Motivational Quotations for Job SeekersLooking for a new job can be hard and maybe sometimes you feel yourself getting a litt le blue. Perhaps a few motivational quotations will help you get back into the swing of things. Review these quotations including these inspirational gems Every new day is another chance to change your life. -Anonymous The brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls are not there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to show us how badly we want something. -Randy Pausch Quotations About Work Life BalanceClearly work is important. After all, you need to make money in order to live. But theres more to life than working, jobs, and careers. Life is all about balance and these quotations will help you remember that. Like this Women, in particular, need to keep an eye on their physical and mental health, because if were scurrying to and from appointments and errands, we dont have a lot of time to take care of ourselves. We need to do a better job of putting ourselves higher on our own to do list. -Michelle Obama

9 things every type B person wishes you knew

9 things every type B person wishes you knew9 things every type B person wishes you knewNobel Prize winner Edith Wharton once said, There are two ways of spreading light to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it. This is an amazingly accurate description of the difference between font A and Type B personalities. Type A personalities are the candles- and theyre usually burning at both ends. Type B personalities, on the other hand, put out every bit as much light they just dont get as much recognition for it.Type Bs dont have all of that sparkle and sizzle that attract everyones attention. Since Type Bs arent as in your face about their contributions, they have a tendency to get mislabeled as lazy or indifferent.That bias goes all the way back to the origin of the Type A/Type B personality paradigm, in the waiting room of a couple of cardiologists. The doctors bedrngnisiced that their chairs didnt have wear on the backs as expected it was only visible on the front edge of the sea ts and the armrests, which suggested that patients were literally waiting on the edge of their seats, ready to jump up the second their names were called. So, the cardiologists- Doctors Friedman and Rosenman- then wanted to find out if impatient people were more prone to heart disease. They discovered that their hunch was correct, and they labeled these impatient individuals Type A. Type B was simply a label they assigned to anyone who wasnt Type A.Its as if Type Bs lack the distinguishing characteristics that drive them to be successful. Type Bs, however, know that this couldnt be further from the truth. The very traits that people assume are the products of laziness or indifference are distinct personality characteristics that help Type Bs to achieve and prosper.Unlike Type As, Type Bs dont feel like they have to be perfect, which means they are OK with recognizing and admitting their weaknesses. This acknowledgment equips them to shore up those weaknesses. Type Bs are also easier to get along with, as they tend to be untersttzungsangebotive rather than rushing, pushing, and criticizing others.Type Bs dont jump to conclusions. Since theyre not in a constant rush, they take the time to analyze all the facts instead of hurrying their analysis just to reach a decision. Type Bs also wont keep beating a dead horse. Whereas Type As can become obsessed with making their chosen strategy work, Type Bs easily switch gears when it becomes obvious something isnt working.In a nutshell, Type B personalities deserve a lot more leistungspunkt than they get. To fully grasp what it means to be Type B, you need to hear it from the horses mouth. Dont take my word for it- lets see what they have to sayWere not lazy were just laid-backJust because our goals arent pulsating like strobe lights on our foreheads doesnt mean we dont have any. We have goals, and we care about them just as much as you care about yours. But we see achieving those goals as a journey, not a sprint. We may stop and smell the proverbial roses along the way, but we still stay focused on where were going and what we need to do to get there.We have a planJust because were not barreling from step one to step two at breakneck speed doesnt mean we dont have a plan. We do. We just keep it to ourselves and follow it quietly rather than assigning time-keepers and judges to monitor our progress and help us stay on track.We careBeing laid-back is not the same as being disengaged or indifferent. The truth is that we care enough to work at the pace were most effective. If we didnt care, wed let you rush us even if that compromised quality.Were contentWe think its great that youre so focused on your goals, but we simply dont think as much about Whats next? because were pretty happy right where we are. In fact, we Type B people report a higher level of satisfaction with our lives, and that lets us enjoy today without worrying so much about what were going to achieve tomorrow.Were healthier than you a reOverall, we suffer less stress, which can lead to everything from heart disease and insomnia to relationship problems and substance abuse. Our ability to relax not only paves the way for better decision-making, it also helps us maintain a healthy weight, avoid cancer, and fight off infections.We make great friendsWe see the best in everyone- including you. Since we dont view life as a competition, were the first to cheer you on and to support you along the way. And we cheer and supportyou, not just your achievements. We think that Robert Louis Stevenson knew what he was talking about when he said, Dont judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant.We work best when were allowed to color outside of the linesDont give us a paint-by-numbers kit wed much rather have a blank canvas and a shiny new palette of colors. While youre squinting at those small spaces, trying to make sure you stay within the lines, were backing up all the way across the room so we can s ee the big picture.We like group projectsWe know you dont like group projects, and we know why there are always a few group members who dont feel that every second has to be accounted for or who dont share your sense of urgency to do everything NOW We focus on the process as well as the outcome. Were happy to share the successes, the failures, and the credit, and we enjoy the give-and-take and collaboration that are part of working with a group, even if it slows things down a bit.We admire and respect you- but we wouldnt trade placesWere awed by your drive and by your breathtaking pace. We recognize the rewards that come your way, and were impressed. But were wise enough to know that were not wired that way. Wed be miserable, and so would everyone around us. So, were content to abfahrt out in the slow lane and see you at the finish line. Well be the ones who are smiling calmly, rather than gasping for breath.Bringing It All TogetherWe really dont mind ceding the limelight to Type A personalities just dont count us out. We have a lot to offer, and we want to contribute. We want to succeed at a high level. However, wed rather enjoy the game and leave the scorekeeping to somebody else. After all, it doesnt matter until the game is over.What other characteristics set Type B people apart? Please share your thoughts in the comments section below, as I learn just as much from you as you do from me.

Find a Great Mentor with These 7 Tips

Find a Great Mentor with These 7 TipsFind a Great Mentor with These 7 TipsThere are many essential ingredients to a successful career, but one that people often overlook is having a ratgeber. These individuals can provide guidance that can help you in your current role and steer you towards a rewarding professional path. In addition, a berater will often extend introductions to those in their professional networks, which can be beneficial if you find yourself in the job market.Unfortunately, many people fail to establish ratgeber relationships because they are intimidated by the prospect of identifying and approaching someone of influence.Following these seven tips can make identifying a mentor less daunting1. Determine what you need in a mentorTake advantage of formal mentoring programs that pair new or junior employees with mora experienced colleagues if your company offers them. But dont be discouraged if your company does not have a formal program- it is possible to find a mento r on your own.Before you begin your search, consider what you hope to gain from the relationship. Consider the specific qualities the person should possess, as well as how he or she might assist you. Its usually best to select someone who has more years of experience and a career path similar to the one youre following.Identify someone who you admire and respect. You can pick an individual who currently works with you or look for a mentor outside your company. Your mentor should ideally be someone who is not in a formal position to evaluate your job performance. Instead, select someone with whom you can talk candidly about career and workplace issues.2. Conduct a personality checkYou may be in awe of someones work, but sheer talent doesnt always translate into an ability to coach. You need someone who is patient and willing to spend time with you. A mentor should also be generous and honest with advice.3. Take the initiativeDont expect a mentor to come to you. After identifying some one whose success and work style you admire, approach him or her and explain that you would enjoy finding out more about the skills and techniques that have helped the person excel. Try not to request too much of this individuals time, particularly at the beginning of the relationship. People will be more receptive to serving as a mentor if doing so doesnt require considerable effort.4. Address any concernsPeople who are approached as mentors are often flattered to be asked and happy to help. However, if someone is hesitant, find out why and suggest ways to make it easier for him or her to provide assistance. If the person seems pressed for time, for example, you might reduce the frequency of meetings or ask him or her to refer someone else who might have a more flexible schedule.5. Take an active roleOnce youve found someone you think would be a great mentor, its important for you to take responsibility for the process. When you meet with him or her, bring a list of questions, but dont expect your contact to have all of the answers. Research issues before you bring them up.6. Be appreciativeRespect your mentors time and adhere to some basic business etiquette rules. Always arrive on time for meetings and keep in mind that while its OK to reach out to your mentor between formal meetings, dont take advantage by constantly calling or emailing him or her. Show your appreciation, too. Send your mentor a thank-you note after a particularly helpful coaching session and always offer to provide any assistance you can in his or her career.7. Think in the long termYou and your mentor may experience some growing pains, so give the relationship time to develop. However, dont be discouraged if your initial mentorship doesnt last. You will likely have several mentors throughout your career. Its not uncommon to seek help from multiple people to address different aspects of work.While it may require some effort to begin the mentoring process, the long-term rewards can be sign ificant. Dont overlook this valuable career resource. The guidance you receive will place you in a better position to achieve your professional goals.Do you have a mentor- or do you serve as a mentor to others? What other pointers do you have for establishing an effective mentor relationship?

Secrets to Success of Best Wall Street Bank Youve Never Heard of (Unless You Work on Wall Street)

Secrets to Success of Best Wall Street Bank Youve Never Heard of (Unless You Work on Wall Street)Secrets to Success of Best Wall Street Bank Youve Never Heard of (Unless You Work on Wall Street)Evercore, which recently ranked No. 4 in the Vault Banking 50 and took the No. 1 spot in Vaults 50 Best Internships, has been killing it in 2015. Its stock has risen 600 percent higher than the SP 500. Its net revenues are up nearly 40 percent. It promoted more employees than ever in its history. And it had its hands all over the largest technology deal of all time.Whats Evercores secret to success?Apparently, the answer, or at least part of the answer, ispicking up dealmakers like dealmakers pick up Hermes ties.Evercore Partners Inc. Chief Executive Officer Ralph Schlosstein said when he sees a banker with a proven track record, his instinct is to bring the dealmaker on board even if there isnt a job opening.Great bankers will figure out a way to make money, Schlosstein said Tuesday during a conference hosted by Goldman Sachs Group Inc. I once read a really great quote from Siegmund Warburg, and he was asked, how did he have so many great bankers at S.G. Warburg. And he said, Its very simple. I look at a great banker the way I look at a nice tie. If I see it, I buy it whether I need it or not.Another part of the answer rests in the fact that Evercore, like a couple other mid-sized Wall Street firms like Lazard and PJT Partners (formerly Blackstones banking unit), has a business model that can cushion the blow of low profits during bear markets.We have a benefit that you at Goldman Sachs dont have, and thats when things get a little tougher, we have a restructuring business, Schlosstein said. Restructuring work generally picks up during economic slumps when there might be fewer banking opportunities tied to mergers and acquisitions. One of the things that we can say to high-talent bankers is, theres more that you can do here in a down cycle.An interesting aside, which mi ght shed some light on Evercoresculture (which always receivesrave reviews from Evercore bankers who take Vaults annual banking survey), is Schlossteins atypical career path to Wall Street CEO. He did his undergraduate work at the small liberal arts and sciences school Denison University in Ohio, and received his masters in public policy from the University of Pittsburgh. After that, for many years, he worked in several high profile government positions, including deputy to the assistant secretary of the U.S. Treasury Department and associate director of The White House Domestic Policy Staff under Jimmy Carter.In the 1980s is when Schlosstein began working in finance. He worked as an MD in investment banking with Lehman Brothers, then went on to found investment management behemoth BlackRock, where he served as president for two decades before leaving to start an alternative asset management firm. In 2009, he was named Evercores CEO, taking over the reins from another man who first served his country before moving on to finance Evercore Founder Roger Altman, who once held the position of Deputy Treasury Secretary under Bill Clinton.In any case, if nothing else, Schlossteins jagged journey to the head of one of the most prestigious investment banks in the country, if not the world, should serve as a reminder that theres no straight path to the corner office with the best views. At least not on Wall Street there isnt.Follow me onTwitter.Read mora50 Best Internships for 2016Wall Streets First CHO (Chief Health Officer) and the Benefits of Leaving Work at 750 Best Banking Firms to Work For

6 Questions to Ask Before Accepting a Job Offer

6 Questions to Ask Before Accepting a Job Offer6 Questions to Ask Before Accepting a Job OfferYou just received a job offerwhich is great news, and you would love to say yes but you still feel a bit unsure. Before you make a decision about accepting the offer, there are some important questions you should ask yourself to evaluate just how well this potential job fits your employment requirements.Have I Been Offered a Fair Salary? Is It Comparable to What Other People in the Same Position Are Making?While money wont necessarily bring you happiness- how much you like what you do plays a bigger role in job satisfaction than how much you earn- you should be paid what you are worth. Find out what others in the same field are making.Compare yourself only to people with similar experience and education. You should also consider your jobs location because salaries differ by region. If you discover the salary is below what you think you should earn, you can try to negotiate the offerbefore yo u turn it down.What Do I Think About My Prospective Boss? Does He or She Seem Like Someone With Whom I Can Have a Good Working Relationship?You dont have to be buddies with your boss and in almost all cases you shouldnt be. However, you do want to get along with him or her. First impressions arent always accurate but you should trust your instincts. For example, it is a bad sign if you witness the employer mistreating workers or saying mean things to them or about them while you are visiting the workdistributionspolitik for your job interview.What Do I Know About My Potential Coworkers?You probably havent had the opportunity to get to know any of your coworkers yet but you may have met them when you were given a tour of the office during your interview. If you didnt meet them, you may have at least caught a glimpse of them at work. Did most of them seem friendly and happy to be there?If you consider the amount of time you will spend at work you will realize how important it is to h ave a friendly relationship with your coworkers. If you havent had any contact with them yet, it may be time to access your network. Find out if one of your connectionsknows someone who works for this employer. LinkedIn is a good place to look.?Will I Be Comfortable in This Office Environment?Some offices are prim and proper while others are more relaxed. While you may be more comfortable in one type of environment over the other, neither may be the wrong place for you to work. If you do think you will uncomfortable in a particular environment, consider looking for a job elsewhere, however.Is the Corporate Culture In Line With My Own Values, Attitudes, And Goals?Does the thought of working an 80 hour work week make you want to cry? Does animal testing make you cringe? Do you always play it straight even if it means you may lose sometimes? Well, a job with a company that requires very long hours supports animal testing, and encourages their employees to win at all costs isnt for you. Can I Handle the Commute to This Job?You should consider how far the job youve been offered is from your home. Driving an hour to a job interview is one thing but making that trip to work twice a day, five days a week may be too much for you. Before you accept a job offer, think about the amount of time you will spend driving your car or being a passenger on a train or bus.

Best Resume 2018 Reviews & Tips

Best Resume 2018 Reviews & Tips Best Resume 2018 - the Conspiracy There are lots of free creative resume templates youre able to use, permitting you to focus your energy on everything else you should do. Because you wish to provide a lot of attention to both, you might not have much room left for different sections, including a resume summary, volunteer work, interests, etc.. When youve reviewed resumes in your field, peruse resumes across fields to know how to vary using action verbs and receive a feel for what makes a potent accomplishment statement. A Secret Weapon for Best Resume 2018 Keep in mind the message that you want to convey with your resume. Just make aya that the resume does not hang between the initial and second page. Youve collated all of the information that should go in your resume. Your contact info and other information are available easily near the suitable icon. As a result of the use of the 2 columns, all entries are scannable and extremely app arent. With industry-specific text examples ready that you personalize, you may make a perfect resume any moment. For instance, it includes a skills page at which you can use icons to clearly show your proficiency in many categories. Youll also receive a cover letter page you could drop a personalized message into. What Best Resume 2018 Is - and What it Is Not If thats the case, then the functional resume format could be perfect. Each resume format was made to improve your odds to find the job in 2018. Employing a proper resume format would raise your odds to find the RIGHT JOB At length, it doesnt really supply the ideal format for those with zero experience. Best Resume 2018 Test out the CVitae template if you wish to use the popular parallax design and create an impression on potential employers. To begin with, you must guarantee a consistent design. An attractive, mindestens and user-friendly template you can edit in accordance with your abilities and experience. B ig number of design style will guarantee you will discover a resume template that fits with your taste.If youre on the lookout for a mora robust option, however, think about using WordPress and a WordPress resume themes. Consider the Resume Dojo HTML resume template if youre searching for a personal site design that has a lot of qualities to display not simply your abilities and education but your hobbies and awards too. The template includes portfolio and client sections where its possible for you to display logos of prior customers and examples of your prior work. Best Resume 2018 Building a professional resume can look to be an intimidating task when youre applying for employment. Resume keywords is the heart of the ATS algorithm. Even youre using non-traditional job searching approaches and dont use any on-line sources. Make sure you reflect the work description when you describe your own regions of proficiency. Even if your work experience is ideal, a subpar resume cou ld sink your probability of getting a work interview. To begin with, recruiters have a tendency to care more about what theyre searching for than what youre searching for. Simply because youve got zero experience or its your very first job. Dont make the error of answering each job posting with the exact same generic resume. Odds are, if youre applying on the internet for a job, your resume will be screened and ranked by means of an ATS. On the flip side, if youve got no resume written you have quite bad chances to acquire work. What Everybody Dislikes About Best Resume 2018 and Why Of course you are able to but this isnt the ideal way to achieve your hiring manager. There are a number of job positions, which demands an education block. When it has to do with the work hunt, you should sell yourself as the very best candidate for the position. Most candidates do not understand and dont believe in the ability of linkedIn network. Best Resume 2018 Secrets That No One Else Kno ws About Employers care much more about your successes, and the way youre able to mirror them at their company. A lot of job landseekers even dont understand where to begin. Marketing professionals have gained significant knowledge in marketing products and solutions. In case the expect to see there your First and Last names you must help them to see them.

5 Things to Look For In Great Video Resumes

5 Things to Look For In Great Video ResumesVideo resumes arent just helping job seekers stand out from the crowd. These profile videos are also assisting employers in making better hiring decisions faster. Unlike a traditional resume, video resumes also allow you to see personality and communication skills in candidates.With 8.2 percent unemployment and more job seekers applying for every open position, you just dont have the time to give everyone a phone screen. Now video resumes are allowing employers to get this same insight without ever picking up the phone. In 60 seconds, youll know whether or not the candidate should move on to the next step of the hiring process.But what exactly makes a video resume great? Here are some things top candidates are doing in their video resumes to put themselves ahead of the packConfidenceConfidence is key for great video resumes. After all, the reason video profiles are so helpful in hiring is because they allow employers to see communication ski lls sooner than in the traditional process. Considering that 55 percent of a first impression is based on body language and nonverbal cues, its essential for candidates to radiate confidence.Look for candidates who are calm, poised, and well spoken. Candidates who avoid filler words like um and like are less nervous and more put together. If a candidate cant even handle the pressure of recording a video resume, how will they handle the pressures of your workplace?Dressing for SuccessOne of the major mistakes candidates make in both their video resumes and video interviews is not dressing for the part. A great candidate will dress for success, even if its just for a video resume. They will look prepared to meet you in person or to handle an important meeting. A casually dressed candidate is giving the implicit message they dont care enough to dress up. A well-dressed candidate, on the other hand, is showing they are thoughtful and conscientious.Background from the BackgroundSimilarly , there is a lot of hintergrund you can glean about a candidate just from the background of their video resume. Staging is vitally important, as weve talked about before from the employer side when scheduling a video interview. Its even more important for candidates recording a video resume. Is there adequate lighting? Is the background neutral and uncluttered? If it is, you know the candidate took the time to stage a suitable background. If your talented candidate is speaking to you in front of a scene from Hoarders, you know this person isnt as detail-oriented as they claim.Quantifiable StatementsThe best candidates will use their video resume to make quantifiable statements about their qualifications and experience. Instead of the candidate merely stating they have superior leadership skills, a great candidate will give you an example of a time they successfully lead a project. Great candidates know the video resume format is best used to give concrete examples.Organizational Fit One of the most important reasons to use video resumes in your hiring process is to really hone in on organizational fit. With one in four companies pegging the cost of rehiring over $50,000, its more important than ever to get candidates who will thrive in your workplace. Video resumes allow employers to see personality sooner, helping you to only move forward with candidates who will fit into the overall organization. The best candidates will show during their video resume their ability to thrive in the company, whether the culture is fun and goofy or serious and focused.Video resumes are helping employers find great candidates and move them along more quickly in the hiring process. If you focus on the best candidates doing everything right in their video resumes, youll soon be hiring great employees.What are some things you look for in a great video resume? Share in the commentsIMAGE Courtesy of Flickr bymofetos